Hi, This is DD Devin of Deevine Lifestyle & Nutrition Health Care….I want to talk about self-care on a deeper level, as a devotional practice, as a spiritual endeavour.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how much do you love or hate your body? On a scale of 1 to 10 right now, how much do you love or hate your body? Are you best friends or enemies?
If you have chronic pain, or illness, or you’ve gained unwanted weight in the past few years (or months), are you at peace with that… or at war with that?
Now here’s another question… if you’re at war with your body, and you know if you’re at war with your body meaning…you’re choosing self-destructive behaviors… while you know that those behaviors are self-destructive, like binge eating, not sleeping, not drinking enough water, not breathing enough, not giving yourself loving touch, not showering, not wearing nice clothes that feel good on your body….
So, if you are choosing those kinds of self-destructive behaviors, and you’re attacking yourself for it, you are at war…. and when you’re at war who wins? When you’re at war with yourself, who wins? Interesting question to ponder isn’t it?
You can’t attack or punish yourself into having the body you want…
I slip into those old familiar habits where I just almost turn my back on myself, eat behind my own back foods that feel comforting in the moment, but then feel really crappy afterwards. Every once in a blue moon, I slip into those old habits and a small part of me whispers….you know what, you could just let it all go, veg out forever and, what if you just didn’t care and you just let it all go… get fat, not care, and then you could just eat whatever you want!
Eat myself into oblivion and not care… and I’m going to enjoy not caring almost like an exquisite pleasure in not caring…. But what’s true though, is that I Do Care! I do actually care… not for vanity, but for health!
I want to live my best life. I want to show my children and now grandchildren, what it looks like to take care of yourself. I want to enjoy the experience of having a body… you know, because having a body is a great privilege and you only get one… So take care of her, right?
And, let’s just say that, we All fall off track. Look, I’m a health coach, and I train health coaching clients by profession, and I Still fall off track. I don’t fall as far as I once did, I catch myself, but here’s the thing…there’s nothing wrong with falling off track… it happens. But at some point, you need to say enough is enough! like OK! OK! I went off track for a while, then I didn’t care, and, you know, OK, enough!
Even though it will be uncomfortable to move after a period of stagnation… it will definitely feel better After! Have you ever heard someone say, I really regret moving my body today? I really regret taking care of myself today?
It’s a reclamation…. and the reclamation…try this on with me: I forgive myself, and I’m ready for this to be different!
I forgive myself, and I’m ready for this to be different! It’s a reclamation and a declaration!
Instead of being at war, we become our own best friend. I am on my side! Doesn’t that feel better than being at war with yourself… like, you ugly turd, you Cellulite covered turd!
You stupid loser, you’re pathetic! Look at you, out of control! Look at your compulsions?
What if we could do the opposite instead? I’m on my side!
I am on my side. I forgive myself, and embrace every challenge that we face with food or body as an opportunity for growth and transformation!
In other words, our challenges are here to teach us. Our challenges are here to teach us!
It’s asking us to listen. If we don’t listen, we don’t learn, and we likely stay stuck and do more of the self-destructive behaviors until we get the message, and that actually you’re here to learn something.
On the other hand, when we listen… we get the lesson… and then we can let go of it, like excess weight!
Excess weight; what are you here to teach me? Instead of battling against it, we own it, and we love it. We love it before we lose it. So if extra weight, or pain, or whatever you’re experiencing that’s unwanted right now, if that is your teacher, what’s the lesson?
Ask yourself what’s the lesson? it could be calling us into a cleaner way of eating. Less sugar and anti-inflammatory foods, and more high quality fats and proteins. It could be that our adrenals are overworking, which means we’re being asked to slow down, do less, and allow ourselves to be more in the Being and less in the Doing… and I know they’ll be all kinds of resistance…
I’m a wife and grandmother, I have these responsibilities… I’m taking care of sick loved ones and you know I’ve got plenty of those too….
It could be that we need more pleasure in our lives, rather than obligation. We get habituated to obligation… and what happens to us then? We become victims….and that’s no fun if you’re always burdened with responsibilities… and so the body will rebel eventually. If you don’t proactively slow down, your body will do it for you.
It could be that we need more sleep. Maybe the lesson that we need to learn from the struggles with our bodies can be about stress. How do you navigate stress and resilience?
Relationship stress, money stress, work stress, family conflict, job worries, negative thought looping!!!
We Must, master our mind! We are not what we eat, we are what we think!
So, if you are always feeling disgusting in your body, it’s not because your body has extra weight on it, it’s because you’re seeing yourself with fat eyes, and you make negative meanings out of that.
That’s bullying! And that hyper criticism, doesn’t let the love in.
The lessons we need to learn could also be about denied emotions, locked in anger, locked in grief, lack of forgiveness, locked in guilt, apathy, betrayal, abandonment, protection…
What are you wanting to protect yourself from?
It takes so much energy, right, when we’re denying certain emotions. When we’re protecting ourselves. When we’re trying to protect everyone else by hiding our truth… that enterprise takes a lot of energy; very stressful!
So how do you break the vicious cycle?
You’ve got to get off the soapbox of reasons to hate yourself, your body, insidious self loathing…you’ve gotta get off it, and you have to Love it… before you lose it!
Most people think that excess body weight or pain is the enemy. It’s not! It’s your teacher! It’s your teacher!
Every time we berate ourselves because we don’t have the bodies we want…the brain perceives attack!
Here’s a little science for you…. anytime the brain perceives attack, whether real or imagined, what happens to the body, it goes into the physiological stress response. And, one of the hallmarks of the stress response is decreased metabolism, that metabolic power that fires that actually burns calories, burns fat… decreases assimilation, and here’s the big snag… increases insulin and cortisol!
Guess what that does? Signals the body to Store more fat! To actually hold on to it and not build muscle, and causes shortness of breath when we’re in that chronic stress state… so stress, negative thinking, it creates a chemical cascade in the body that literally catalyzes the opposite of what we want, which is more freedom and limberness and spaciousness and joy, ecstatic creativity yeah!!!
So step one, is really to love Exactly What is…
So what are you negating right now, that you can welcome in? Are you pushing it away, trying to cut it out? Negate it, amputate it? Conquer it?
Instead, Pull it in like a kid waiting in line for a hug! Just pull it right in, all that muffin top, pull it right in…
Second, declare your reclamation! I forgive myself, and I’m ready for this to be different! Yeah
And #3, prioritize self-care like your life depends on it.
What’s it like for you right now in this moment when you open to embracing exquisite self-care as your number one priority?
Do it with me right now. You have to access it, in order to answer this question.
What’s it like for you right now in this moment when you open to embracing self-care as your number one priority?
That’s not meant to stimulate resistance, I’m not suggesting perfection… I’m simply suggesting walking yourself to the starting line. I’m here with you. We’ll walk to the starting line together.
What is the one thing that you can do today, to move in the direction of exquisite self-care?
Maybe it’s taking a shower. let it be easy. It’s not a 3 hour you know workout or something… it’s something easy. Yeah… we gotta make health a priority… So what’s it like when you allow yourself to love yourself where you are right now in this moment?
Self-care is not selfish. That’s actually the most unselfish thing you can do, because everyone gets a better version of you when you take care of yourself and self-care is the key to unlocking your creative potential!
If you’ve been wanting to feel motivated in your business, blogging, or painting, or whatever allows you to feel expression… self-care comes first.
I’m gonna end there, but I just want you to be with that question so go ahead and leave a comment in the chat let me know what inspired you in this video, tag someone who needs this message right now, and let’s all just take better care of ourselves.
What gets to happen in this world, in our collective, when we say I’m on my side, in the healthiest way possible?