Well Hello Everybody, This is DD Devin of Deevine Intervention, Lifestyle & Nutrition Health Coaching with my Wednesday’s Walk Your Talk on What Works and What Doesn’t.
I want to chat with you today about Asking for Help! And, this is a BIG one for a lot of us. A lot of us find asking for help rather challenging. Or, maybe we do it but we do it with a little bit of a Victimeee tone to it. Or we do it, but we don’t really think we’re gonna get it. We kind of do it, but we just assume we’re gonna get a no. So I’m gonna talk about all of that.
Is asking for help easy for you? If you are anything like me, you may find it difficult at times – especially when it feels like a big or vulnerable request. Many of us are so incredibly strong and independent that asking for help does not even occur to us. Or we assume we are burdening someone. Or fears of rejection surface so we play it safe and come up with all kinds of reasons not to ask.
Okay, so let’s talk about asking for help! It’s Okay to ask for help! You are not a bother when you ask someone for help and support. Especially a lot of you people pleasers and givers out there, there are probably people in your life that would LOVE to help you! They just don’t know how or don’t think you need it, because you’ve formed this whole identity of ‘I do it all on my own, and I’m good, I’m the strong one, I’m always the one helping everybody else….so, they don’t even know what kind of help you need, so they would probably LOVE for you to ask for help.
So, first you’ve got to get over that, people don’t have time or that you’re a bother. One thing to Really keep in mind, when you’re asking anyone for anything, is, they have, full autonomy to say No! I always remind myself of this one….oh, I don’t want to be a bother, I don’t want to pressure them….I check in with myself, am I like, am I going to be pressuring them in Any way? Am I going to be giving them an ultimatum, am I going to be threatening them? The answer is pretty much always, No! So, clear on that, and then, this person, has the full ability to say No!
They have the ability to say no, and, I trust, that if they mean no, they’re gonna say no. See, here’s a Big way you’re getting in your way when asking for help….you’re Assuming, that you know somebody better than they know themselves. You’re assuming that your friend, or your sister, or your partner, is too Busy for you and they’re gonna say no. They know better for them than you do.
So then, why instead of pretending to read they’re mind, you just ask them. And, it Truly, is a gift that we give people when we ask people for help and support. We actually allow them to feel good about themselves. And, there can be go givers without takers. And when you’re asking for help, PLEASE don’t come off like victim and setting yourself up for a no.
‘Well, I just want you to know that you can really say no, and I know you’re really busy, but I’m wondering if you could help me this weekend cause I’m moving and I just need some help packing boxes, but it’s Okay, I know you’re really busy, so I’m good and it’s totally okay, you can say no.’
Don’t’ go into asking for help, with That kind of set up! Because basically, you’re disempowering yourself, and you’re Almost convincing them to say no before they really even thought of that. So, stop doing that.
And also, stop being victim. Don’t go…Oh my gosh, I’ve had a really hard week at work, and I just have so much on my plate, and the person who usually helps me is sick, and da da da da da….like, you don’t’ need to give your story. Often times we come with that victim sob story energy, because we think we need to justify asking for help. Enough of That! Just be Honest and loving and state your request.
Let’s say your friend’s name is Jessica, and you need help moving. Jessica, I’m moving next week. I’m completely overwhelmed by how much I have to do. Do you have two hours, that you could come over and help me pack and keep me company, it would mean a lot to me.
And then Jessica can say no or yes. Not so hard right? So, when it comes to asking other people for help, Get Out Of Your Own Way, and stop thinking you have to do it all on your own, and Stop thinking that you know them better than they know themselves.
So, there’s a couple other places I’d like you to ask for help. Remember, that You also have a Massive inner helper inside of you. So when I notice I’m super stressed out or in my worry or overwhelmed, I go into my own intuition, into my own inner coach, to my own inner wisdom, and I say, Okay, part of me, higher-self part of me, I need your help. Is need my intuition to come forward here. What’s Really the Truth? What do I Really need?
So remember, you can rely on yourself in a different way. Most of us rely on ourselves by putting all this pressure on ourselves to figure everything out on our own, and do everything on our own…and we Forget, that there’s this super, Super Wise part of ourselves that we can connect to….but we have to Stop the doing and all the figuring out, monkey mind chatter, and get quiet, and listen inside.
The second thing we can ask for is help from our guides. Help from Universe. Help from Spirit. And, it’s a very simple prayer. Spirit, Please Help. I need help! The great thing about asking from help from the Universe is that you can be as specific as you want. You can be specific and say, Hey, I need help finding a job. Hey, I need some help in generating some income here. Hey, I need some help in freeing myself from the stress that I’m feeling….you can be specific….But also trust that the Universe already knows your prayer, and often times angels and guides are just waiting around, Waiting for us to ask for help. That’s why they call it free will.
It’s a simple prayer, Hey, Universe, I need help. You pretty much know what I need help with. So, help. I’m open to help. I receive help! Just Make that declaration.
And the final way you can ask for help, or at least the final way I’m going to talk about in this video, is to Ask for Help, in Identifying and meeting your Earth Angles. And I was motivated to share this one with you because that’s how many of my clients have come to be. You know the saying, when the student is ready the teacher will appear?
When you’re really ready to leverage that ,we can say to the Universe, Alright, Universe, God, Spirit, I’m ready for my teacher, my healer, my guide. The person or people who can really help me move to my next level of growth or healing. Please Guide me in meeting them. Please put them in my path. Please put the people in my path that will refer me to them. I’m ready! Please drop them in my life!
Every Single Time I’ve done that, when I’ve needed a healer, or teacher or helper in some way, like BOOM! It Has Appeared!
So, you are not alone. You do not have to Do everything alone. Help is Always available. But you Have to Ask.
The Worst thing that can happen, is someone may say no. But that’s not going to make it any worse than it already is…by sitting around asking for no help. And just because one person says no, doesn’t mean Each person is gonna say no….so Don’t get discouraged….AND….if you ask for help from the Universe, remember, a Prayer is Not ever Not answered…It’s just sometimes not answered in the WAY or the Timing that our ego wants. But all prayers are answered.
Alright, so that’s my little quickie for today. If you found this helpful, please share it, and thank you soooo much for listening.
I’m sending you so much love and many blessings.